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QUICK JOKES

 

What's a hindu?   Lays eggs. 

 

What did Mr. Spock find in the toilet? ...... the captains log.

 

What's the difference between a porcupine and a Porsche?
The porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

 

How many ears did Davy Crockett have?
Three - his left ear, his right ear, and his wild front ear.

 

What do you do if an elephant comes through your window?
Swim! 

 

Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
Because it was dead.


 

How many men does it take to wallpaper a room?
About two - if they're thinly sliced.


 

A man receives a phone call from his doctor.
The doctor says, "I have some good news and some bad news."
The man says, "OK, give me the good news first."
The doctor says, "The good news is, you have 24 hours to live."
The man replies, "Oh no! If that's the good news, then what's the bad news?"
The doctor says, "The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday."

 

I bought some camouflage trousers the other day. put them in my cupboard and haven't seen them since!!

 

Did you hear about the blind man who went bungee jumping?
He loved it, but it scared the hell out of his dog.


 

How many ears did Davy Crockett have?
Three - his left ear, his right ear, and his wild front ear.


 

What do you do if you come across a tiger in the jungle?
Wipe him off, apologize and RUN!

 

What's brown , lies on the bridge of the Star Ship Enterprise. Captains Log.
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